Wow, I am so sorry for not keeping this up to date. I have to admit I have been on Facebook more but I have still been extremely busy.

First, I want to thank everyone out there:family, friends, ward members(I consider you all friends) and strangers for helping us out. We had some successful fund raisers and collection jars as well as very generous people during christmas. We still have bills rolling in, but it was good to see the kids have a good Christmas.

Condition wise, I still struggle. If it isn't the nerve pain, it is the migraines, the constant lack of sleep, the anxiety, fear, hopelessness, nightmares, and flashbacks that I still deal with. I went to the U of U for a week last year and had a video EEG to see what was going on with my seizures, and was back in the U of U emergency room December 2nd (again I was there the previous December 2nd too), and had 5 more seizures. I now have two Neurologists looking into the problem and are checking to see if the pain is causing the seziures, or the seizures are causing the pain. Once they decide, they will have a plan of attack.

My eyes are fine, as far as the doctors can tell, and the pain related to them may be the migraines. So there was a little good news.

I am also seeing the doctors at the U of U pain clinic. I have the best pain doctor who has helped me with my CRPS, but at the U of U I will get a comprehensive pain plan to try and manage this beast.

As I said I struggle every day, but I keep fighting. Daily I pray for a return to normalicy so I don't have my six year old daughter crying so hard she is hitching wishing for her "normal family" again. That is the hard part, not only does the CRPS effect me neurologically, it also affects those around me. It is hard to tell people about my condition because there are no outward signs, and it affects my family because they see me at my worst. It is hard to be in pain all the time, I tell the therapists that it just wears me down.

I hope to keep this up better so I can enjoy the kids more. My baby Joe is walking (before a year old even) and the other kids are just growing up so fast I feel if I don't get this under control, their lives will pass me by.

Thanks one and all for your prayers and thoughts it sure helps when I need it most. John